I dont normally post under this forum but seeings as I am a young adult (23)im going to now.
Im just at an extremely low point at the moment and feel so much anger and helplessness i just want to scream. I was on Raptiva for 24 weeks for my mostly inverse psoriasis and it did jack really but it cost us $6000. Im off now and have been on MTX for 2 weeks to hopefully avoid a flare from Raptiva and if it works well ill stay on it. seemed like after a week or so i was less itchy and red and was feeling hopeful that this stuff would work well for me. I know its still early days but stuff is worse again at the moment and im just so scared that things could get really really bad from coming off Raptiva soon because ive read so many horror stories here.
Im just completely and utterly devestated with this problem. Its has ruined me physically and emotionally.I used to be very active, went to the gym alot and played sports etc. Now its so hard because of the discomfort i get from sweating and the friction etc. Whenever i sweat it is so uncomfortable its unbearable, even walking is so hard sometimes.
Then there is the dating situation or lack of it. Since My psoriasis got bad and spread in May last year I have pretty much been avoiding and kind of intimacy. last time i was sexually active i was with my girlfriend at the time and it was a nightmare for me. i had psoriasis on my andomen and around my groin and sex was incredibly uncomfortable. When i got up i was bleeding all over on stomach and it was so flared up i just almost collapsed with grief. It has improved a fair bit since them but im so psychologically damaged and fear the pain and embarrassment that could arise again.
It is all so hard to deal with. I hardly go out anymore and when I do i usually wish I hadnt. going out to clubs and pubs etc like i used to is so hard seeing other young people enjoying themselves when I have this horrible burden under my clothes. I pretty much stay away from girls as much as I can which is very hard because im an alrite looking guy and used to be good with the girls. I still get girls looking at me and often my friends (who have no idea about my psoriasis) say stuff like ' man see that chick shes checking you out' or ' my friend likes you' etc and i always just pretend like im too good for them or say something stupid like 'not my type' or some crap.
I just feel like a shadow of what I once was. Sometimes I think back to other problems i had and used to stress so much over and they mostly seem so trivial now. I have an identical twin brother with NO PSORIASIS! i just feel bloody cursed ill tell you that! Im trying so hard to be brave. Im back at University and trying hard to have some sort of social life but its just so so hard. If MTX fails me I dont know what im going to do. Enbrel is $20,000 a year here and theres noway i can get it.
Anyone that can offer me any support or advice would be greatly appreciated as I desperately need some. Thanks for reading my novel and take care!

I am sorry! : (

Hey mate!
I wont lie to you! Its hard trying to deal with the whole dating game thing!
what can i say-its bloody hard enough to do without trying to jump the extra hurdle along the way!
Im new to this chat room thing aswell-i stumbled accross this site and was drawn to everyones storys and my connection to them!
Being a single bloke with psoriosis myself i know only to well about not having the confidence to chat to the girls or have the fear of being blown out!
In my expierience you either control psoriosis or let it control you!
the old saying is a problem shared is a problem halfed!
telling your close mates or new uni mates about your psoriosis would be one of the best things you can do!
i took the time to explain my condition to my mates and made sure they understood! at first they didnt understand that i couldnt just get a magic pill or cream that would make it go away! but i was determind to educate them!
Now they now about my psoriosis its easy for me to relax in a social enviroment with them! when your down the pub you will always get closed minded people saying things like errr whats that on your head and whats wrong with your finger nails! All i say now is-with the expression on my face of are you thick!-"its psoriosis!" and walk away!
you will find that your confidence will restore its self and you will be more comfortable in pulling the girls!!
go for the right type of girls you get on with and tell them about p if you think you might score with them! if you get blown out because of it then they were just not worth it!
I want to hear about you pulling the girls!! and show your mates that when it comes to running the 100m sprint of pulling girls-you run the 110m hurdles and still beat them!!

Hope this helped or even made sense?
laters! G.

I feel the same way, totally. Angry and helpless and grief couldn't describe it better.
I have had 0 luck in dating, and I have P on my face, which I think is responsable for it. The blessing of it though, since it's on my face, it's impossible to cover, so I'm not self consious at all about having my P exposed in public. I'm not sure how I would feel about undressing with someone I would be dating for the first time, but I'll cross that bridge when I get there.
It might not be any consolation to hear this, but almost everyone is self - consious about one thing or another. They feel like they're too short, to skinny, have a couple blemishes, cellulite, ect. I try to put P into perspective, and it seems rediculous to compare P to 3 pimples, because P is clearly more severe. But whatever someone is self - consious about seems like a huge burden to them.
I guess what I'm trying to say is to try and not get carried away...I have problems doing that and it's not easy, but it's a starting point we all should take, with psoriasis or not. I figure if the psoriasis is going to limit me, I should try my hardest to not limit myself.

Hey guys thanks for the replies and nice to meet you ManUK and Magician! Thanks also to my friend Gemma. Hope your still going great on the Taclonex!
Just curious what treatments are you guys on magician and ManUK? you guys tried methotrexate or any Biologics?
Im feeling a little better at the moment. Just was having a really crook day when I posted last time. They just come around every so often and I just feel like im completely going to crack up. Dont know if you have days like this when it all gets way too much!
I actually have confided in my best friend and told him I have psoriasis and it turned out his dad and 2 of his sisters have it and he doesnt understand how I can get so upset about it. I guess in a way its good that some people dont think much of it 'just a lil skin thing' as it can make you feel like theres nothing really wrong with you but on the other hand it can make me annoyed when people trivialise my suffering and think im crazy or weak for letting it upset me. I dont really feel the need to tell anyone else. Noone can see it. just about all my psoriasis is hidden in my skin folds where noone can see it so i never had problems with what I can wear out. I guess my case is more of a silent pain as noone in everyday life can see it, probably alot different than most people with psoriasis. I guess in a way im lucky that people cant see it on me until i get intimate etc, but i also probably have more physical limitations at times.. i dont know really. I know im crapping on now sorry ;).
I still believe ill meet a great girl who will accept this crap, just may take a little time I think. All i can do is hope hope and hope that MTX works for me really well and if it doesnt well, its still not the end of the tunnel. Atleast there are better treatments out there and more coming all the time even if they are probably out of reach for me at the moment!
Well thanks again and let us know how your doing!!

I'm glad my message had a positive impact :)
Right now, I'm using Dovonex ointment on my body 2x a day (when I comply), I just started Olux foam on my scalp. I've only used that once so far and it itches like crazy. I picked at my scalp a bit a few days after that and it burns too. I'm trying UVB for the first time. Too soon to know what will happen. And I started some cream (loprex, I think it is) for my face. My face is the hardest to treat, since it's bad psoriasis and everything is too strong for it. And my eyelids are affected.
My G.P. suggested I should try biologics last year when my psoriasis was way worse. I declined because the discription of it sounded like a joke 'It's kind of like chemotherapy'. That's appealing lol. After reading about it, I would consider it but only if I got worse. I've been pretty sick this year, with a bad cold, and now sinus infection (I've been on antibiotics for over 30 days), so the last thing I want is a surpressed immune system. And I've heard some stories about people rebounding, but that seems more ancidotal; I've never seen a study about that.
I'm still going to do what I'm doing with doctors, but I'm hoping a new diet will help, becaue I constantly flare.
Basically, I have a HORRIBLE diet - I eat whatever I want and got to the point where if I wanted to keep eating like I did, I would have to take pills to keep from burping vomit in my mouth.
I'm hoping my body is inflammed, because if so, maybe if I give up the horrible stuff I eat (everything) I'll improve. And I'm going to try and only eat hormone/antibiotic free meat and dairy just incase. I don't drink, smoke, drink caffene, eat many tomatoes, potatoes, eggplant, ect. so I don't think that diet would help at all. If I super size my self, I'll have to supersize my tupe of dovonex, so it can't hurt lol. Basically, I'm trying to do everything I can while taking as little chances as possible.
Oh yeah, and I never take vitamins or anything enriched with them (like cereal, bread), so I'm working on that too.

When i got up i was bleeding all over on stomach and it was so flared up i just almost collapsed with grief.
So much for my lunch.
But really all that sucks, I suppose I don't have it THAT bad. I assume they will find a cure EVENTUALLY

Robbie:
I am sorry you are having a rough time. I've been there and still struggle from time to time. Keep at it and hopefully you will find something that helps you get clear. Keep us posted. I'd write more but I'm at work.
Tom

Oh. I had great results from MTX in the past. It takes about 6 to 12 weeks to see decent results. If you're so inclined there is a lot about diet and nutrition out there. It doesn't work for everyone but if you are generally healthy the recommendations aren't that big of a switch once you get used to it. Search the boards for alternatives and diet. Again, keep us posted. Also, does sun help? My home UVB unit is a lifesaver.

Hi Tom thanks alot for the replies. Ive been on MTX nearly 4 weeks now and I think im improving a little atm but its kinda hard to tell for sure, but im expecting better things soon hopefully. Thats great MTX worked well for you! may I ask how long you were on it?, what dose?, and why you came off?
I havent had any side effects at all except for a couple of mouth ulcers that came and went which i am happy about.
Im a generally very healthy already so I guess some of the diets might be an option if MTX doesnt work out. Thanks for the suggestion
Thanks again!

Robbie,
I also have a twin sister who never had psorisis until recently. I dont know what caused her to flare up but she did. She's my identical twin. I've had it since I was five and she just got it 2 years ago at the age of 21. I think you and your twin should go to a doctor that does research on P. They might be able to figure out the difference in you two. I completely understand your situation with dating. It has kept me away from dating also. People dont understand why Im so insecure. Im always told how beautiful I'am but on the inside I feel the complete opposite.
I have also tried Methotrexate. It only worked for a few months and then I began to flare up again. I'am currently on Remicade and it is working wonderfully. I havent had a flare up in over 6 months.

it's interesting that telling people about p is hard but then i often come across people saying that they know someone who has it, either a relative or a friend...so many people are affected and we have to cope, it makes us much stronger people than the 'others'.
it sucks but then again, there are worse things. maybe that's the end you come to when i've had it for 18 years now...

i know exactly who you feeel. i have a little bit of psoriasis everywhere, and it seems to get worse time after time. i mean. its the most stressful thing in my life. so im sorry for how your psoriasis is acting up, because i know exaclty what your going through. i mean. i have kept up with my treatments and they help. a little, but its still there, and now it seems that my psoriasis has falred up on my legs, and i mean im a girl that enjoys skirts in the summer, you know, ad now i dont know how ill show my legs anywhere. i eventold my boyfriend about my psoriais, and he understood, but i just wish it went away, because i dont feel comfortable in my own skin. you know how it is. blah. i hate it. i actually cried when i read when i read your post, it proved of how psoriais SUCKS. i wouldnt mind if i was like OLD and got it, but im 18. and ive had this for like a year. and im praying for a cure, because this is the most stressful thing ever.

Hey!!
First of all, youve made the first step in your psoriasis struggle by coming here to talk to all of the wonderful people on these boards. Everyone is here to help support you and answer your questions.
I am on methotrexate, and have been on it for .... im not even sure? More than 2 years though. Methotrexate has done WONDERS for me... I went from being like 75%-ish covered to only have a few spots on my elbows.
I wish i could say methotrexate was a miracle drug and would cure everyone, but its not... As with all medications, they work for some people and not for others... I do hope things continue to go good with the methotrexate, and the biggest advice i could give to you is this: stay up to date with your blood work, and MAKE SURE youre taking the folic acid also.
Hope all goes good for you, PLEASE keep us updated.

I am on methotrexate, and have been on it for .... im not even sure? More than 2 years though. Methotrexate has done WONDERS for me... I went from being like 75%-ish covered to only have a few spots on my elbows.
can you take methotrexate for such a long time???

it sucks that y'all are going through this stuff...
i guess i don't really understand why people have such a tough time dating with p.....and i don't get the lack of self-confidence either. I've had p for 16 years now....i guess i finally stopped caring about what people think.
i've been on enbrel for almost 3 years now.....it's my miracle drug.

Well thankyou all for your replies I appreciate it. Ive currently been on MTX for just over five weeks and off Raptiva for well over 3. Looks like ive avoided the dreaded Raptiva flare now hopefully which is sigh of relief. As for MTX i have definitely noticed a pretty good improvement in my skin already which is encouraging. Im hoping it gets better and better in the coming weeks. Ive been having a few annoying side effects like a couple of mouth sores, and feeling a bit faint every now and then but nothing to worry about really.I guess I gotta get my blood test results though to see how my liver is coping.
Well thanks again for everyones input and ill post again soon about my progress!

Rob man, I understand SO much what you are going through. I'm 28 and I've been in your boat since I was about 20. When my g/f left me after 3 something years I figured I would be alone for ever because there is no way in hell I will get naked with anyone again. I've had girls make out with me plenty of times while I carefully guide their hands to my non-P zones. I have a lot of P on my side so I hate when a girl goes to grab my sides cause I know they will feel it. I hate when a girl goes to stroke my hair cause I know they will feel some wierd stuff. I actually ruined a chance with this one girl who I liked alot because she started to make out with me out of nowhere and all I could think about was 'Oh it's on now' and then BOOM I realized that my skin is TRASHED. I had to tell her to stop and she had no clue why. I haven heard from her since.
Plus it SUCKS with my friends also. My two roommates are exactly like me, except without P. So when it comes to summertime, god it sucks to be with my friends. They are constantly wanting me to go to the lake, rent a boat or jet ski, go to the pool, or do SOMETHING summery. And I just CANT anymore. They both know about my P, but I havent shown them. I wont show them ever.
I feel for you man cause I seriously believe I know exactly what you are going through.

I understand where you are comming from but you can't hide your P forever. It's a terminal disease. As of right now there is no cure for it so you have to assume that you will have it for the rest of your life. And if by some miracle there comes a cure than you can be extatic. But why let P ruin your life when you could be out having fun? I lost 12 years of my life worrying about P. I have had it since I was 4 and it wasn't until I was 16 that I finally realized it's dumb to hide myself. I am who I am and people will either like it or not. There is nothing you can do to change their minds. I have met some of the most amazing people in my life, whom are my friends, and they don't care. They have seen it and it's no big deal to them because it's not contagious. I hope that you read this and take baby steps to comming out. I live in Arizona, which in the summer is THE hottest place in the world to be. And I wore long sleeves, and pants all summer long to hide my P from EVERYONE. I hated it and I hated myself for having it. And then a miracle happaned. I told one of my best friends about it and she not only accepted it, but was there for me when I told the rest of my friends. It still took me until I was a senior in highschool to be able to wear short sleeve shirts. Being comfortable with your P doesn't come instantly so don't expect that, but if you take baby steps one day you just won't care if you have it. I was lucky enough to have learned it still in highschool so I didn't have to go out into this big bad world afraid to live my life. Right now, I've never been happier. My P is back really bad, but I don't care. I am who I am and there is nothing that I can do about it. I live with my boyfriend and I'm sure that he knows I have it, lol, but he's never really asked about it and we've been together for a year and 4 months. You just need to realize that this is something that MAY stay with you for the rest of your life, do you really want to miss out on seeing the world because of stupid disease? I sure don't, and I hope that you don't either.

Thanks for the replies guys I appreciate it. Ive been on MTX for about 10 weeks now and i have had some improvement but it seems to be constantly fluctuating which really sucks but what can you do?. I guess this is the best I can hope for atleast for a while as most other things seem out of reach at the moment (ie enbrel):(. It still has a major major impact on my life and my self esteem. I cant workout or play sport without discomfort most of the time and i just feel too paralysed to even consider trying to date again etc at the moment. I am terribley depressed and even have suicidal thoughts sometimes. Sigh. I appreciate alot your helpful postive attitude advice but im just not there yet. I guess ill have to learn to be somehow .. Thanks again!

feeling comfortable with your p won't come over night. But you have to start by realizing that you are who you are and there is NOTHING that will change it. you have this disease for a reason. I honestly believe that I have p to make me realize not to judge people by their looks. So that I know exactly how it feels to be discriminated against. There are people out there with terminal illnesses like cancer. Those people have a right to be depressed, but we just have a skin disease, it's something that CAN and WILL eventually go away. But if you don't start living your life the way you want now, you will eventually realize everything that you have missed out on. I missed out on my prom, gym class, and swimming until I was almost an adult. Living your life in fear of judgement is no way to live. But like i said, feeling this way won't come over night. You have to take baby steps to feeling better. Like... just one day try not to think about your P and just live your life the way you used to. Maybe not showing off that you have it, but just by forgetting or not thinking about it, it's one step closer to feeling more and more comfortable with it.
I hope this helps :)

Hey, I hope it's ok that I comment although I am not a teen or young adult. I just wanted to say that I totally understand. When you have P you think there is this thing to hide, and you are afraid to reveal it when you are dating. But I swear that MOST people have something like that they feel self-conscious about. It could be a scar, their weight, a medical condition, a weird family, whatever. There is so much pressure about looks for all of us, but it is really intense in your teens and 20s. If there is someone around that you are interested in, get to know them and by the time you show them your P, they will already like you for other reasons. No guarantees, but people with all kinds of less-than-perfect bodies do meet great partners!

Have you tried going to the tanning bed? That always helped keep P in check for me. Also taking fish oil seems to help.

tanning beds won't work because they have the wrong type of rays. and i took the fish oil pills it made my acne break out really bad. i dont suggest it if you already have oily skin.